Friday, May 22

The new whiz-kid on the block! ISC Topper:

"City boy tops ISC with 99.25 %" screams a TOI article. It turns out the city is Kolkata.

Disclaimer: You may stop liking me if you are one of those people who don't think evil people should exist on this planet. On the other hand, if you are one of my ex-es or their friends, you anyway don't like me, this post will give you one more reason.

Excerpts from the post:
Subhajit had succeeded in beating over 50,000 students to the top spot. With cent per cent marks in maths and computer science, the St Joseph's College student notched up 99 in physics, 94 in chemistry and 97 in environmental studies. He scored 98% in English and 92% in Bengali.
Surprisingly, the first look at the marks he obtained don't suggest they'll result in 99.25%. Indeed, (100 +100+99+94+97+98+92)*100/700 = 97.14 %.

Now, I wonder what's wrong. Am I missing something? Is there another subject in which Subhajit scored 114 out of 100 (which probably is not a feat considered worthy of a mention by TOI) so that the percentage makes sense? OR is it another of those TOI articles where they fabricate details/title to sensationalise the article? If it is latter, TOI needs to fire their chief sensationaliser. Notwithstanding that fact, 97.14 (or 99.25 as the case may be) is an amazing feat.
Subhajit Ghosh isn't the average nerdish topper. "He paid a lot of attention to what he studied, rather than how much. He spent time on solving question papers and also went through the study material other than his prescribed books. He only took tuitions in English and Bengali, the rest he prepared by himself," said father Subhashis.
OK, let me be mean. (Yes, you are welcome to leave those anonymous comments! :-P ) No one would come on national newspaper and accept that he is a nerdish topper. I was not, and I am sure neither were you! AND we all paid a lot of attention to what we studied, rather than how much. We all spent time on solving question papers and also went through the study material other than our prescribed books.

Tuitions! HAH. I did not take any tuitions, not even for English and definitely not for Bangla. Did you?

But here is the clincher:
The Kolkata boy is now looking forward to testing his academic mettle at the finest engineering institutes in the country. "I am looking at either studying aerospace engineering at IIT-Kanpur or mechanical engineering at BITS, Pilani. I've given the competitive entrance exams and I'm expecting to rank between 500-600 in the IIT-JEE," said Subhajit confidently.
This, IMHO, is the cue when we should all pray "Bhagwan iss ladke ko satbuddhi dena." If some dude (with a 99.25 TOI %) is getting a rank between 500-600 in the JEE, WHY, in this whole white world would he take Aerospace engg. There are no god-damn jobs in that department. And no Subhajit, you will not be working on Airplanes and satellites and shit like that. You won't even be recruited by Boeing or Airbus. I know you want to join NASA and emulate Rakesh Sharma but I doubt even if ISRO trusts an Aero engineer from an IIT. Next, Mechanical engineering from BITS Pilani? - IMNSHO - It will be a disaster dear topper. I am told their dream job is with John Deere. I'll leave the smart readers to figure out the rest.

And I almost missed this point: How can he so confidently suggest that he is getting a rank between 500-600 in the JEE. I am sure the JEE chairman himself may not be in a position to make such comments. Anyone who has written JEE can vouch for this fact. I think this is a result of all the fake ranks that the FIITJEEs and likes dole out on their website. But then, this guy is a whiz-kid, with a 99.25 TOI %.

Here's the wicked part of my post: (skip it to spare yourself the BP rise. If you are a faculty member in the anti-ragging department of IITM, you are prohibited.)

Here's my wish: I hope this dude comes out with flying colors and joins IITM and he gets Alak and he is in 357, (which will be empty next semester; I'll stay in 358) so that I can send him to Minar at 1.30 in the night to fetch Egg Biriyani! And r@g him till he breaks down.
MUHAHAHAHA. Worst case, if he joins IITK, I'll hunt him down in December during the inter-IIT and send him to their Minar!

[I used r@g because I don't want to end up in jail 'chakki-peesing' for ragging. What if the goons at MHRD have a Google alert for 'rag'?]

24 comments:

amrit said...

LOL - bachche ki le li tune!

Tushar Rathee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Deb said...

Why have 7 exams at all if you calculate aggregate on the best 4 subjects..apparently it's English plus best 3! Ultimately stupid! and Go RATHEE! lol what a rant! I think you beat Lays!

ramblingperfectionist said...

It's english plus best 3 because we(yeah, I did ISC :) ) don't HAVE to take more than 4 subjects, totally. (Actually, this is the old rule, new rule is English+Environmental edu+any 3). So the thinking is that penalizing someone for wanting to learn more subjects than he had to, well, doesn't make sense.

And ouch. Making a lot of assumptions, aren't we?

Shrey said...

To testify Rathee's point, I came from a certain school called St. Lawerence High School in Kolkata and the topper of my school:

1. Used to carry the water bottle around his neck.
2. Hadn't shaved for life and sported a thick neck beard (it might be because he thought that shaving was a big as a sin as masturbating, if not any bigger)
3. Sported the biggest and the thickest and rightly so, the ugliest pair of Gandhian spectacles ever seen by mankind
4. Used to cringe if he couldn't get the first seat right under the teacher's nose (This because he believed that he might be able to figure out the nature of the question paper by analyzing the viciousness of the teacher's fart)
5. Carried a 25 kg bag everyday to school in the hope that carrying the heavy weight of knowledge might help him to become a heavyweight in knowledge

P.S. He wanted to pursue Medical Studies but didn't bother to write AIIMS as, just like every other Bengali, he believed Jadavpur University to be the 'be all and end all' of higher education.

Vikas Shenoy said...

Seems like a bong-fire out here.

@ Amrit - Indeed. :D

@ Tushar - ROTFLMFAO.

@ Deb, Yeah... Rathee wins, hands down.

@rambling perfectionist, Only 4 subjects in class 12? That is ridiculous in itself!

@ Shrey, Ha ha ha. I think I will add the two bong comments as my next post. Hilarious! I am waiting for Shatto to reply - I am sure he'll have interesting insights too :D

Anonymous said...

Dude maybe math is for 200 marks or something. :)

Anurag Verma said...

just imagine - poor guy has no idea what's being done to him right here... someone forward him the link

The Dryad said...

@Rathee: lmao

@Shrey: The mindset in Bengal is freakishly similar to the one here in Kerala. This mate of mine has to endure these pitying looks from his relatives- they think he went to NALSAR cos he couldn't gain admission into Ernakulam Law College:|Aand, this is not an isolated example.

Also, none of the "toppers" ever crack entrance exams. Why do you guys think this is so?


That said,its T to bash his Aero ambitions. Sorry Lays, but jobs are not the main criterion for everybody when it comes to choosing a course. At least the nerd appears to have some idea as to what he wants to do eventually.

Vikas Shenoy said...

@ Anon - :-)
@ Anurag - ha ha. Today was JEE result,I will google him up and figure out where he is! And guess who the JEE Chairman is: GS.. ha ha ha.

@ Dryad: Well.. "toppers" do crack entrance exams. May be not in Kerala and WB. One plausible explanaition could be that toppers just mug, in the real sense of the word but are not smart like us :-D

AND, trust me when I say this - he has no fucking clue what he wants to do eventually. I will eat my hat if he 'knows' what he is doing. I'll tell you this: every guy (and the odd girl who gets through) writing JEE at some point wants 'Aero at IITM/IITK' - and then people drill sense into his mind!

Check with other folks here at the insti - I am 100 pc sure they'll concur. And yeah job is not the main criteria in the first year, but when the push comes to shove in the final year, it is :-)

Shrey said...

And from what I guess, Aero because of the fact that when he was a 6 year old and people used to ask him, "What would you become when you grow up", the chutiya wouldn't have any clue and would have nonchalantly said "Pilot" just like millions of other kids.

Sayan said...

How easily we form opinions about a guy whose fatal error was to score 99%. Extending personal view points and experiences into a generalization is not something we should be doing especially when we are arguing with an underlying tone of being the ones who 'know how things work out'.

99%. Personally I feel such percentages make no sense. But yes, who knows that guy may actually come to IITM (in spite of being a Bong from Kolkata like Bofi)and turn out to be a Satcho or a 10G or a Amrutash.

Btw Lays, ISRO is stuffed with Aero mataks from IITM.

But I agree. 99%. Whats the point of such exams?

Vikas Shenoy said...

@ Shrey, ha ha

@ Sayan, Aero mataks go to ISRO? That's good to hear. But am sure BTechs would not really dig the prospect.

Anonymous said...

why rip apart a kid and his obviously delighted father???
n ohhh... we all thought of aero once so y hold it against him if his wishes just got published...
english tuitons??? well everyone is not a linguistic genius like yourself...
u could do better than to laugh at a kid in a situation where you were 4 years ago..
im sure ur father is a well educated man and he 'somehow' knew that a debuting branch was a good option for u.. he might be the 1st good student in his family and hence doesnt know what to choose..
laughing at such handicaps is something that only shitheads like u could do

Vikas Shenoy said...

Dear Anon,

Thanks for the comments. I was expecting (and did rightly acknowledge within the post) anonymous comments like these. :-)

I am not taking any delight away from the kid - infact, I did congrtualte the bloke on his marks. I am just tripping on the article.

And do google 'ad hominem' method of argument.

Cheers.

Unknown said...

@The last R@g part
350 Waggy
352 DB
356 Ugri
357 Layz, never found there
358 Shammo
128 Soccer
120 LCB
109 Lathi
107 Yashasvi

I can survive a quiz on Alak's room occupants in rapid fire mode for atleast a minute!

@The article
I guess pretty much everyone of us hates the stereotypes. These days I just ignore the newspaper articles featuring photographs of district/state toppers.

Everyone's ranting. The point is that they're true. This means we don't really need to rant. Ofcourse, this implies we have real life evidence.

Mother of Gujarat Board Topper c. 2004, in an interview "he wants to study outside of Gujarat, somehwere in an institute of national importance. But JEE and AIEEE exams are so difficult, I just can't understand how anyone can clear them."

Then this was during the intermediate session between the two papers in JEE 2008, Surat centre. I hapenned to overhear a convo between a topper, his friend and his mom, Topper to his mom,

"Now we know what the real stuff is. During the whole year we used to go to this snacks place after tuitions. And we used to throw challenges at each other, if I'm unable to reproduce a physics derivation word by word on paper (read charachter by charachter) I'll have to treat the other guys with one samosa each."

Need to appreciate that guy's himility, cuz I distinctly remember him saying this is the real stuff.

But yes, thats the way things go in Gujarat. By the looks of it, they are the same in WB and Kerala.

@Ad Hominem arguments and all the related stuff
Sadly, its taken for granted that if there was an accident, and there was a truck driver and a kid involved - it'll be the mistake of that truck driver. And it doesn;t take much for the crowd to assume that he was a drunkard.

With respect to the quote of the lady, yes, the same insults can be thrown at me, while the point is - I just wanted to show the level of awareness and the thought control levied on modest and disciplined students.

As for the second quote, well, I didn't insult anyone, did I?

Dharav Solanki said...

Oh, by the way, that last comment was by me.

Dharav Solanki said...

@Aero Comments

I myself wanted to get into aerospace. But I never made any queries regarding that. Somehow, all the JEE aspirants want to go for Aero. Last time I rememeber, this one friend of mine wanted to praise this girl, he said "You've gone for Electronics and Telecommunications, right? But you're much more brainy, why didn't you go for aerospace?"

I really do not understand the whole thing.

Shanu said...

Lol..that was funny!!

If the poor kid reads this..he wld end up wishin he didnt score 99%

P.S: I think aerospace engg sounds way cooler thn mechanical engg...job prospects b damned!!

Vikas Shenoy said...

@ Dharav, thanks for the post.. err.. comment :-)
Aero guys need to brainy? :-P

@ Shanu, Thanks. I sincerely hope that the poor kid doesn't read this post, for the better of the world.

And true, 'aerospace' sounds cool - it can get you a girlfriend, but not a wife! Mechanical - a wife, but not a girlfriend.

My dept - Engineering Design - Neither! :-/

Dharav Solanki said...

@Vikas
:D :D

You know I checked this page five times to see if someone ommented on that. Nice response :|

Anonymous said...

Firstly some misconception about BITS-Pilani here..our dream jobs are our own companies!..secondly hope this whizkid does not join Pilani!

Anonymous said...

Well Subhojit did get AIR 626 in JEE and he studied in fiitjee in 11th nd 12th. As far as board toppers clearing JEE is considered then I guess you guys haven't heard abt Piyush Srivastava. He was ISC All India topper in 2005 and besides that he got AIR 1 in IIT-JEE & AIEEE that year. The guy who topped ISC in 2006 is also studying Electrical Engineering from IIT Kanpur.

subhojit ghosh said...

dint kno such comments bhind my bak :P
newaz its fun!! carry on guys....
btw i neva sed i wanted mech engg at bits pilani ... god knos who typd dat article
i wanted aero or mech at iit... fynally dcided upon mech engg at iitk.... njoy!!

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